Genesis 2
24. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
25. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
The pathway to sexual intimacy is oneness. Sexual intimacy is the consummation of oneness, but without mental and emotional oneness, sex is either rape or mere bodily exercise without any lasting fulfillment.
There must be first a mental and emotional joining before fleshly oneness and not a thing done once for all but something maintained till death do them part.
There has to be mutual nakedness in all things with one another without being ashamed or being afraid of what the other person will do with the nakedness before physical nakedness should happen.
It may be easier to be physically naked to one another than to be so naked in other areas of life but physical nakedness is the last thing that should happen. It happens automatically in marriage when the two are able to reach nakedness in other areas of life without fear or shame. It is crippled automatically when one or both discovers that there are things yet to be disclosed in areas of life.
In our days, sex has become cheap but God's standard remains the same. The man must leave his father and mother, cleave to his wife, become one before nakedness that won't cause shame or fear. That's the order with God.
There is a commitment beyond mere physical contact that must be before sexual intimacy should happen. There has to be a commitment towards protecting each other's nakedness. You don't entrust your nakedness to someone who don't care, otherwise it'll cause shame.
Now after the commitment has been signed by marriage, it becomes binding to be naked and not be ashamed. It is both a right and a privilege to both offer your nakedness and to enjoy the nakedness of your spouse.
But the rule remains same in marriage, there has to be nakedness in other areas before that of the physical. It isn't sex first. When there isn't openness in other areas of life between a man and a woman who are supposed to be one, then it's mere taking of advantage of each other to be having sex.
If you are ashamed to give certain information and afraid to be open in particular areas of your life because you couldn't trust your spouse with those information then something fundamental needs to be done to heal that part of your relationship. The physical nakedness you are still enjoying may not last if something isn't done to deal with that situation.
Infidelity is sharing your nakedness with others beyond your spouse. It is a shame in itself. That's why it isn't something that can be done openly or that you'll be naked or be open about without being ashamed or afraid. That's same with other areas of cover ups.
That person you can't entrust your nakedness to without it being abused doesn't deserve your nakedness. That's why marriage should only be with someone trusted who is worthy of such trust.
That's why we ought to go about with that sense of responsibility towards the nakedness of our spouses in deep commitment and not as something that doesn't matter.
Can you truly be naked with your spouse in every area and not be ashamed? Can your spouse be totally naked with you beyond mere physical intimacy and not be ashamed? Are there things you are afraid of letting your wife or husband know? Are you someone who can't handle the nakedness of your spouse without losing your head?
To earn the nakedness of your spouse, you'll have to be his or her cover. Nobody will be naked with you who isn't sure if the next thing is that you'll take the pictures and share on social media or use as a bargaining strength to take advantage of him or her.
You don't deserve your spouse's nakedness if it is to make him afraid or ashamed. If you won't be his or her cover, then you don't have a right or the privilege to his or her nakedness.
If you are yet to be married, make sure you are ready to be naked and to properly handle the nakedness of the other person, and make sure the other person is one who can also be naked and not be ashamed.
If you are already married, if there are areas where you both are covering up from one another, those areas need to be reviewed to know why. Perfect love casts out fear. There's no shame in perfect love. If there's fear or doubt in your heart towards your spouse, deal with it, otherwise it'll degenerate into hurtful separation that makes nonsense of the relationship.
We always have areas to work on in our marriages, if this is your own to work on, then roll up your sleeves and get down to work. If you work on it, it'll work.
I wish your marriage bliss and peace!
Have an intimate weekend with your spouse.
If this has blessed you, don't quit before you share! Thank you, God bless you greatly!
Photo by Helena Lopes from Pexels
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